Prepare for ReMarriage

Almost three out of four remarriages fail, but statistics say that couples who participate in premarital education report a 30 percent higher level of overall marital satisfaction and better communication! That means you are greatly increasing your chances for success by preparing for the adventure of a second marriage before you head into it!

While we were dating, Dale and I had driven to Estes Park, Colorado. We sat overlooking the beautiful mountains, sharing our past pain and heartache and asking each other question after question. It was a great place to discuss the possibility of our future together, to explore whether we were ready for a redemptive marriage. We promised to reveal our thoughts, fears, goals, and needs to each other completely before even considering a second marriage.

Every night for several weeks after our time in the mountains, we made lists of things we wanted to know about each other—everything from how we were raised to finances, to roles and goals, to expectations and pet peeves, to sex and health issues, to our previous marriages and our children, to our relationships with God, and so much more. Each question prompted twenty more, and some of the questions were serious, deep, and scary.

Being open and honest made us feel very vulnerable, and we realized this kind of openness could make or break our budding relationship. But we also decided that without complete honesty, we’d be marrying a person we didn’t really know. And while we were in love and wanted to move forward in our relationship, we first needed to know God’s plan for us. So we talked, shared, and completed an 8-week premarital course, working hard to really know all we could. There are a zillion things you should know about one another, so do your homework well.

What was the most interesting question you ever asked your spouse?

 Adapted from The ReMarriage Adventure: Preparing for a Lifetime of Love & Happiness, by Susan and Dale Mathis. Copyright © 2012, all rights reserved.

 

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