Micro-Seasons in Marriage

midlife coupleEcclesiastes says “there is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens”. That includes those micro-seasons of marriage within every day, week, and year.

So how do you manage those micro-seasons of marriage? Let’s look at Ecclesiastes 3 and see what guidance it might bring, especially as we head into the New Year. Now is a great time to evaluate your marriage and see what you might need to explore.

A time to be born and a time to die. Are there negative things in your schedule that need to “die” and new things you might want to “birth”?

A time to plant and a time to uproot. Are there habits that you might need to uproot or new habits that you may want to plant?

A time to kill and a time to heal. Might there be some toxic things in your marriage that you need to kill, or do you need to take some time to heal from them?

A time to tear down and a time to build. Can there be some walls built up between the two of you that need tearing down, or walls of protection you need to build up?

A time to weep and a time to laugh. Do your conversations go deep enough that you can both weep and laugh together?

A time to mourn and a time to dance. Do you share one another’s grief and mourn together as well as celebrate each other’s accomplishments and dance together?

A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones. Are there stones of accusations or bitterness that you need to lay down, or stones of remembrance you need to gather?

A time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing. Do you take time to romance each other and are wise about showing affection at the appropriate times?

A time to search and a time to give up. Are there things you need to discuss and explore, or other things you need to give up discussing?

A time to keep and a time to throw away. Might there be things of the past you need to revisit—or throw away—in order to strengthen your relationship?

A time to tear and a time to mend. Are there fences that need mending or offenses that need tearing up?

A time to be silent and a time to speak. Are you careful about knowing when to speak and when to be silent, especially when trying to resolve conflict?

A time to love and a time to hate. Is there sin in your life that you need to hate so that you can really love?

A time for war and a time for peace. Is there peace—and not war—in your marriage?

           Just a little food for thought for the New Year. May your marriage be blessed in 2014!



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